one family crime wave

monday night....2.00am my garage alarm goes off... i get up and go downstairs armed to the teeth with my full arsenal i keep under my bed..my garage door (which is an up and over) is a foot open which is about as much as it takes ro the 130db alarm to frighten the bejeezus out of any unsuspecting light fingered scumbag. Unfortunately he scarpered, before my night vision took hold so i could drill a hole in his head but i know where this bastard lives..
do i ? :

a) go to the police with no film evidence
b) snipe the bastard with a .308 from 800 yards with a FMJ to his neck!
c) visit him with baseball bats and acid
d) get his sister pregnant
e) get his mom pregnant
f) shoot his pitbull (that might have given something away!!)
g) set fire to his house with him in it!
h) talk to my doctor
j) talk nicely to him, saying i know your're a theiving scumbag and please kindly refrain from such activities upon my serfdom.

In my opinion talk doesn't work, so can I vote for one of the more extreme (and fun) options?

As you know don't leave any trace....

All of the above - in that order.
Sorry to hear about that, its horrible when your property and posessions are violated.
Hope you get the message across.

d and e and film said act and post on you tube.
Wait, first try to impregnate him, only using the baseball bat like a turkey baster.
If the scum knows you know, you need to confront him so that he doesnt get further ideas.
Me, I'm a pussy, I'd go to the nearest constable and then sleep with one eye open

Leave the .308 at home... don't want to get done for wielding a deadly weapon!
If you've got a pistol, wear that. Over a shirt, under a shirt... just make sure he knows it's there.

Go see him... smile... offer him some words of wisdom, somewhere in the "Try it again, I'll be waiting" and explain to him about the Castle Doctrine!!

God bless America!

So you know who the offender is?

You sure he did not open the garage door and see an aprilia and think it was not worth it

Double tap

Being a pitbull owner wouldnt impregnating his mother and his sister be the same thing?

Well if you do choose to live on a council estate, sh1t will happen.

The good wife who works in a lab recommends Potassium Chloride. It induces a heart attack that apparently cant be detected afterwards due to the heart producing it during the attack.
Keeps me in-line knowing she knows this and has access to it.

Keep your attention you are discussing way more serious crime, that one has been done, in a public forum... Always feel a bit sick when someone begins to write or talk about acid, gasoline, poison and sniper rifles... First - too much hate. Second - too much pussy attitude... Sorry and no offense, but it just does not feel right... A man should have two fists and a head to solve a problem... Not necessarily in particular order

C, D, and E

It's not a pussy attitude, this is not a stand up, protect your honor fistfight.

It's a "I'm going to teach you to stay away from my shit" beating.

They are not the same.

Yeah and this is all hypothetically speaking off course....

Set your spleeping bag next to que .308 tripod in the garage and turn off the alarm



Then go do D) and E)

Hmm are you Walter White in disguise Crotchrockety

I'm sorry but i can't condone this kind of violence to poor C.H.A.V's the idea of a .308 FMJ round to the neck is totally inappropriate under these circumstances even at 800yds........















.....personally i would use a .308 110gr Hornady V-Max round..... much more of a sting!

Someone has to do it.
I was even sober this time.

I have a couple weeks off work, and it has rained nearly every day. Got the SD all cleaned up and ready to ride, and it's been downpouring for an hour now.

Gives me more time to lurk here and injure threads so Ronin can come by and finish them off.

Acid?! Where the hell do you get that stuff?! - Go on, tell me you can make it from the skin of fruit!

Much easier to get ahold of weaponry here in West By God Virginia!

I have no registered weapons, they were all stolen

Go to his house, subtlety armed, explain you know it was him and the next time ANY bike goes missing in your area you will show him how much pain/ damage your chosen weapon can do.

Don't do it just for yourself, do it for EVERY bike owner in the area!

And if you happen to live it Wiltshire ask him to give my ktm supermoto back!

Danno,he knows you and you know him.That means he know's you've got a young family so dont put them at risk,pay some nutter a ton and get both his legs broken. Yeah i know it's not the same as doing it yourself but at least you'll smile in satisfaction when you see him being pushed down the street in a wheelchair + if he has another go at the garage later on i doubt he'll be running very quickly so you'll catch him and can meter out a good beating in self defence

Words of wisdom right there.